Always wondering why your kids seem so much happier when everything sticks to the schedule, right on time?
Me too! But you might have wondered if routines are really all that important for kids. After all, they’re kids – aren’t they just way too flexible for such rigidity?
Yet, while routines for children may be underappreciated, they’re also undeniably the difference between smooth days or tough ones, happy kids or cranky ones.
And routines can do more than make your life easier. Routines have the power to shift your child’s brain, body and very soul. How they affect your child, basically, depends on how you use them.
So let’s start in on 10 reasons why routines are absolutely amazing for kids – and by the time you’re done reading, you’ll be ready to plan that bedtime chart hands down.
10 Reasons why Routines are Absolutely Amazing for Kids
Provides a Sense of Security
Think back to how it felt as a child when you knew exactly what was coming next – maybe it was Saturday morning cartoons or a daily bedtime story?
That predictability wasn’t just fun, it was comforting. Routines are extremely secure for children. Knowing what to expect makes children feel safer, and it helps them approach their little world with confidence.
Research shows that children benefit from having such regularity; according to a poll by the American Academy of Paediatrics last year, if kids have a daily schedule, 75 per cent of them will experience fewer manifestations of stress.
A structure gives kids a sense of control, and nothing feels better than that.
Encourages Independence
Ever look on in amazement as your little one gets dressed without being asked, or brushes their teeth without a reminder?
It’s the magic of routine. With practice routines build autonomy.
As kids become intimately familiar with daily tasks, they internalise the roles and start to complete them without prompting.
For example, having the same morning routine – getting dressed, brushing teeth, eating breakfast – that your child can gradually complete more independently, is a little bit like giving him the tools to succeed. He knows what’s coming, and he can run with it!
Improves Focus and Concentration
Have you ever noticed how it’s harder to concentrate when things are chaotic around you? Well, the same is true for children. When a child’s day is haphazard or chaotic, concentration can become tricky.
A structured schedule keeps things calm around the child and makes it easier for the child to focus on the task at hand – be it homework or play.
Indeed, research demonstrates that children are more likely to improve their focus when they are following a daily routine. A report printed in the Journal of Early Childhood Research discovered that children performed better in brain-training drills in structured environments when compared with their unstructured counterparts.
Promotes Healthy Sleep Habits
Bedtime wars! Sounds familiar? It’s true that being a parent can be a rollercoaster. But a predictable bedtime routine, a consistent transition from wakefulness to calm sleepiness, fixes most of your little one’s sleep problems. A predictable, calming ritual, be it bath, book or lullaby, tells your child’s brain it is time to slow down.
According to the National Sleep Foundation, children who follow a bedtime ritual fall asleep more quickly and sleep longer. Imagine less bedtime tantrums and a groggy zombie child in the morning. Talk about a win-win!
Fosters Emotional Stability
Kids’ emotional weather is generally unpredictable, which is why routines provide such an anchor. When it’s the same day after day, they generally know what’s coming next – and, if they don’t like what’s coming, at least they know when it will end. As a result, they’re far less likely to feel jolted by unexpected change or sudden surprises.
In that sense, the very predictability of a day provides emotional stability, even if such days aren’t necessarily filled with glee.
For example, if children know what’s coming after school – travelling home, then afternoon snack, homework then playing – this helps them navigate transitions without an emotional rollercoaster.
Boosts Time Management Skills
While teaching time management might sound like a tall order, routines ensure that it happens naturally. If your child knows that certain activities happen at certain times, it starts building a whole idea of how to manage time.
A consistent schedule lets kids know what’s coming next – play after lunch, a favourite show after dinner – and eventually they learn to allot their time well, an important life skill they’ll carry into adulthood. Bedtime means your child might be late for an important meeting as an adult? Awesome!
Strengthens Family Bonds
Do your best family moments come when you’re at home with your family doing the same thing over and over again? Is it a nightly family dinner or reading your child a story before bed? What are you doing that is taking those precious moments and turning them into rituals that create memories and bind you together?
Routines help develop these things – shared experiences that families bond over, tunnelling experiences that exist because of the regularity of daily tasks, and the serendipity that sprouts from them.
It is around these things that good conversations can happen. It is here that memories can be built, and the days’ minor triumphs can be shared. And most importantly, children are more likely to share and be themselves when they know these opportunities are coming. It is so much easier to ask about the day when you are side by side, clipping your fingernails.
Helps with Transitioning
Transitions can be difficult – for grown-ups as well as kids. Moving from one activity to another isn’t always smooth sailing, and kids can wilt when an activity must end, especially if they’re immersed in play or a favourite television show. Routines make transitions easier.
Armed with clear signals for the next step, kids learn how to move from one activity to another without as much pushback. If bathtime is the signal that follows dinnertime, they can more gracefully transition from play to wash time as the dinner dishes are clearing. With predictable cues, you might experience fewer meltdowns as kids have adjusted.
Builds Responsibility
A longer-term advantage of the routine, however, it that it is a genuine boost to responsibility. When children know they are supposed to brush their teeth or pack their school bag or tidy away their toys because it’s routine, it takes less and less external reminding.
It’s not for chore completion’s sake that children do chores; it’s for the responsibility lesson they glean in the process. Over time, this lesson in responsibility will contribute to accomplishing schoolwork, maintaining relationships, and eventually finding a job.
Creates a Calm Environment
Even though we like to think that children crave play and excitement, they actually need calm too. Chaos can be anxiety-inducing, and calm attitudes make for calm children, so routines are a great way to be consistent and take some of the stress away from your children and from yourself. A good daily routine is a great way to structure your day.
You know the feeling, when everything just seems to work? That’s the power of routines. A placid home where your family’s needs will be met when they arise, day upon day, minute upon minute. Fewer frantic scenes at the last minute because your child is overtired from the chaotic day. Bliss.
Wrapping Up: Ready to Create Your Routine?
Routines are not simply a means to an end, to get us through the day; they are part of the lens through which your child sees the world, feels and manages their moods and reality, and takes responsibility. Independence, sleep, growth, emotional regulation – you name it, routines matter.
What is it that’s getting in the way of establishing a new routine? Bedtime battles? Bustling mornings?
Take a small step in the right direction. You and your child will thank you later. Looking for smoother days, easier transitions and a happier home?
Nothing like the start of the school year to make a new routine, create a schedule and get things back on track after a lazy summer. Ready to get started?
Talk to me: What are your rituals already, and what new ones do you want to try? Comment below and let’s swap hacks.